We often hear that communication is the key to a team’s success. Yet in reality, many leaders confuse talking with communicating.
Communicating is not about multiplying meetings, distributing instructions in bulk, or sending dozens of emails. It’s about creating a space where ideas flow freely, where everyone feels heard, understood, and respected.
Stephen R. Covey expressed this principle in a sentence that should guide every leader:
“Seek first to understand, then to be understood.”
This posture radically changes the dynamic of a team. It allows hidden talents to emerge, tensions to be defused before they become conflicts, and above all, it engages every member in collective success.
Active Listening as a Foundation
Active listening is the cornerstone of authentic communication. It requires a conscious effort from the leader: eliminating distractions (phone, screen, interruptions) and being fully present.
But being present does not simply mean hearing. It means:
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Asking open-ended questions to clarify the other person’s thinking,
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Letting the speaker fully develop their point,
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Resisting the temptation to interrupt or conclude too quickly.
Many managers find this exercise difficult because it means giving up control. Yet it is in this space of free expression that creativity and trust are born.
Silence also plays a key role. Allowing a few seconds without intervening may feel uncomfortable, but it is often in that silence that the other person dares to go deeper, reveal an idea, or express a concern.
Giving a Voice to the Quiet Ones
In a group, some naturally speak louder and more often. Introverted personalities, however, risk being drowned out if the leader does not open the door for them.
The manager’s role is therefore to seek out those quieter voices—not by forcing them, but by inviting their opinions, valuing their perspective, and creating safe spaces where they can express themselves.
Often, these contributions provide unique insights that enrich the whole team.
The Importance of Non-Verbal Communication
Words are only part of the message. According to Albert Mehrabian’s 1971 study, still cited today:
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7% of the message comes from words,
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38% from tone of voice,
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55% from body language.
In stressful or emotional situations, 93% of communication is therefore non-verbal.
This means that your gestures, posture, gaze, and tone must be consistent with your words. If your words say “I am confident,” but your body expresses nervousness or impatience, your colleagues will be confused and lose trust.
A Real-Life Example: Words vs. Body
This became clear during my ascent of Mount Washington with my sons. We were about 2 km from the summit, in the middle of the climb, when my youngest son, 16, said: “Dad, I can’t go on anymore.”
He had hardly eaten because of stress and was clearly dehydrated. So I asked him to sit down and drink some water. I also encouraged him to eat something. I tried to remain calm to help him calm down.
My other son, who had gone ahead, came back and told his brother to calm down—but shouted at him. Not exactly coherent, and certainly not the right message for someone under stress. As you can imagine, it only increased my youngest son’s stress.
A Practical Challenge for Leaders
Here’s a small challenge I’d like to offer: pay attention to what your body and voice are saying that may contradict your words. Ask for feedback from people you trust to identify elements to improve, so that your words have greater impact and the negative effect of your body language is reduced.
You’ll likely be surprised by the feedback you receive.
Conclusion
Active listening and mastering non-verbal communication are not accessories of communication—they are the very foundations of trust.
A leader who knows how to stay silent, ask the right questions, and align their gestures with their words creates an environment where employees feel understood and valued. And when employees feel listened to, innovation and performance naturally follow.
Discover How to Delegate Better in 5 Steps
Would you like to learn how to delegate better to free your mind and reduce your stress?
My practical guide, Master the Art of Delegation in 5 Key Steps, is designed to give you simple and effective tools to:
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Help your team members grow and take on new responsibilities
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Identify who in your team can support you
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Reduce your stress and reclaim your time
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Escape firefighting mode and become strategic again
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Improve workplace atmosphere and collaboration
If you’re ready to transform your leadership style and build a more engaged and high-performing team, I’m here to support you.
Together, we’ll work on practical solutions to overcome your current challenges and achieve your future goals.
Contact me today to learn more.
Carl-Michael Tessier, M.Sc., MBA
Coach in high-performance team development and tailored leadership support
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